02.03.10
The IF Crowd
In high school, I was never part of the “in” crowd. Not that I was a complete outsider. I mingled with the “in” crowd but was more on the fringes.
When I started this blog back in 2006, I was in a very different place — we were in deep as far as infertility diagnosis and treatment. I had one goal — having a baby. I happened across other blogs of individuals going through similar circumstances and in the process, I felt like I was not alone. Other IFers shared their experiences and I shared my own. Thankfully, the hardest part of our IF journey was short. We did one round of IVF and nine months later, here was Nathaniel. According to the statistics, that only happens for about 50% of infertiles. And a lot of the blogs out there are for people with the worst case scenario — who have been through multiple rounds of IVF or other procedures and who have encountered all kinds of obstacles, or maybe even worse, had cycles go perfectly only to end up with nothing but debt and heartache.
I’ve seen others post about how a lot of people in the IF world judge you by how much you’ve been through to get your miracle. The more heartache = the more credibility and greater internet following = part of the “in” IF crowd.
I am very happy that I have not experienced the same heartache I’ve read about on other blogs. We’ve been very blessed.
But recently, one of the blogs I’ve read for years went partially password protected. The blogger asked that people interested in continuing to follow her journey email her. So, I emailed her, explained that I’ve been following her for a long time, and said I’d like to continue following. No response. I waited a while, knowing that she was busy and going through an IVF cycle. Still nothing. So, I thought maybe she’d missed my message. So, I wrote another short note. Still nothing.
I know I am a paranoid person, but the only explanation I can think of is that I just don’t cut it in the IF world. I haven’t suffered enough. Again, I find myself on the fringes. I guess it really doesn’t matter — but it bothers me that people who are publicly sharing their lives and experiences would shut out someone who has followed their story for a long time and poses no type of risk. Especially when they asked interested people to email and ask for the password.
Oh, well. I still wish her the best for this cycle.